Wedding Elections 101

You just said YES to THE question and the ring is sparkling on your hand.  But before the blush has worn off the happy couple the next question lands:  When? Before you start the constant decision making process of gowns, reception halls, guest lists, and flowers have you paused and looked up?  To the sky that is.  Welcome to Wedding Elections 101.

Picking out wedding date is like picking out the birthday for your marriage.  By taking the stars into account, you can see how your union will support desires for kids, your careers, and your individuality all at the same time.  What counts the most is when you say your vows.  Go ahead and plan your rustic autumn reception in the barn or the tropical destination celebration on the beach, but even more importantly, choose the day you will solidify your marriage.  

Why Astrology?

The sky can give an amazing viewpoint of where your struggles will be in your marriage as well as your points of ease.  It can set the stage for prosperity, happiness, and give you insights as to what areas might be sources of tension.  Also know there may not be an absolute PERFECT day, but it’s a matter of picking out what is optimal for you and working with what you have.  

What’s even better is you can do this yourself by following a few cardinal rules.  If you have the time, get a calendar and head to www.astro.com to start looking for days.  

The Basics:

Venus

This planet represents the marriage itself.  Whatever you do, make sure Venus is not in Retrograde!  This is a must.  On average, Venus retrogrades for about 6 weeks every 18 months.  When Venus is in retrograde, you are adding a level of complication you don’t have to have.  It may mean there could be additional tests to your union.  You could be setting up energy where you need to restore or rework the union in the future.  Is it completely unworkable?  No, but if you can avoid it, do.  

Take a big red pen and cross off all the days when Venus is in retrograde.  For 2020 those days are May 13 – June 25.  Venus will be direct in 2021 and 2022.

A happy Venus is your foundation.  She truly characterizes the whole marriage.  For the strongest placements, look for times when Venus is in Taurus, Pisces, and Libra.  Try to avoid Venus in Aries (more of an independent marriage or quick flight of fancy), Venus in Virgo (a bit nit-picky at times), or Venus in Scorpio (intense).  Let her shine by being supportive and loving.  

Venus in Taurus:  March 4, 2020 – March 20, 2020 

Venus in Libra:  October 27, 2020 – November 20, 2020. (However remember Mars will be in retrograde until November 14, 2020…more on this in a second).

As a bonus, to ensure kind words and supportive emotions, try to make sure Venus is in a trine, sextile, or conjunction to Mercury or the Moon.  All of these works well.

Mars

For 2020, Mars will also be in retrograde from September 9, 2020 – November 14, 2020.  If at all possible, try to avoid getting married during these dates.  Mars retrograde has a tendency to  asks us to doubt our actions.  This could be as simple as someone having cold feet or setting the stage for someone constantly questioning if marrying was the best decision.  

Saturn

Many people fear Saturn, but he’s really a help in a wedding chart.  This planet governs tradition and time endurance.  It’s wonderful to have a a Moon, Sun, Venus, or the planet that rules the chart in a sextile or trine to the planet that rules time itself.  You are just adding that foundation to the house of your marriage.  On another note, please avoid Sun square Saturn. This makes it so hard to grow together as a couple.  With this aspect, you are begging for frustration as the individuals are fighting to identify themselves in the marriage.  

Days to Avoid:  April 19, 2020 –  May 20, 2020

September 22, 2020 – October 22, 2020. 

Sun and Moon 

One of the cardinal rules of wedding date selection is to make sure the Sun and Moon are in a supportive aspect to one another.  The Sun and Moon represent you and your partner and you want to make sure that relationship is a friendly one as the years progress.  Aim for either a trine (120 degrees) or a sextile (60 degrees) between these two planets.  This will ensure you two will be sitting together sipping pina coladas on a cruise ship in retirement or rocking on the front porch watching a sunset.

Many brides envision themselves saying their vows on a beach at sunset or during a full moon.  While this sounds wonderful, the symbolism screams NO!  During full moons, the Sun and Moon are opposing one another which really sets up a dynamic of making choices me vs. you throughout the marriage. 

Sunsets

And as for riding off into the sunset? A wedding at sunset really does indicate that it’s going to take some work to get one of you fully into the marriage.  At sunset, the Sun is merging into the horizon and moving into the 6th house of work.  One of you won’t be fully present in the marriage by either yielding all of their personality into the marriage or escaping into work.  A marriage is about two people coming together to celebrate their individuality and active choice to be in the union.  Go ahead and make the wedding celebration and reception on the beach at sunset, but get thee to a courthouse beforehand to solidify your legal vows.

Eclipses

Likewise, avoid eclipse dates.  This just sets up an intensity that you don’t need in your marriage.  Generally speaking, eclipses always symbolize endings. I would definitely pick a new moon over a full moon any day.  Ideally, you would want a moon that is building from the new moon up to the full moon (waxing).  This symbolizes the ability to grow together.

Ideal signs for the moon:  Taurus or Cancer.  The moon are in each of these signs once a month.

Mercury Retrogrades

If you can, try to avoid Mercury retrogrades.  I’ve had others get married with it in retrograde and something went wrong.  The officiant was late, the paperwork wasn’t right, travel was affected, and so forth.  With one wedding, the busses never showed up to take the guests to the church.  Imagine feeling stood up by your whole congregation!  It’s not the end of the world, but it will test your sense of humor.  

Mercury Retrograde in 2020:  February 16 – March 9

June 18 – July 12

October 13 – November 3

Venus and Mars

These two planets are the indicators for you physical intimacy.  For a spicy sex life, Venus trine or sextile Mars is a great aspect to have in a wedding chart.  But make sure these two planets are not in a square (90 degrees) or opposition (180 degrees).  You will find with difficult aspects, “Sorry, not tonight, I have a headache,” could be a common phrase.  

A word to longevity:  sparks do fade over time and that is ok.  This is why it’s important to lean into the Sun/Moon aspect.

Timing of the Day

So now that you’ve picked your date, it’s time to time the chart by the hour.  Avoid placing the Sun, Moon, or Venus in the 6th or 12th house.  An easy way to eliminate the Sun being in the 6th or 12th is to really avoid two hours right after sunrise or sunset.  There are some faith traditions that prefer weddings at sunset.  

Try to get the ruler of the Ascendant in the 7th house if possible.  

Try to get the Moon in the 7th, 10th, 4th, or 1st house.  

Word to the Wise

Wedding elections aren’t the end of the world!  What matters the most is that you found the person you want to spend the rest of your life with.  Every marriage has ups and downs and wedding elections just give you an extra boost to your foundation.  My parents didn’t use astrology to get married and they’ve been together for 46 years!  You can totally see where their sticky points are in the chart, but they have made it work well.  

Also know that 2020 is a rough one to pick out optimal dates for even seasoned astrologers so don’t pull your hair out too much.  

I’m happy to help either as a second opinion or do the whole thing for you!  I offer a full service wedding astrology consultation.  For more information click here.

The Birth Chart: 10 Fun Facts

Let’s chat it up about the most fundamental building block of astrology:  The Birth Chart.  It is a map of where the planets were the moment you took your first breath.  It is your astrological DNA. From that, astrologers can tell what your gifts are, what your challenges might be, and help you time what events can manifest in your life.  In short, the birth chart  is the natal promise of who you are.  Let’s talk about some of the fundamental parts of a natal chart.

1). The birth chart looks like a wheel divided up into 12 segments.  Each of those segments represents a different area of focus in your life.  For example, the first house is all about your health and self-identity while the seventh house is all about relationships.  

2). There are 10 planets to divide up among 12 houses so everyone will have empty houses.  Do not worry about that.  An empty house doesn’t mean you have nothing going on in that area of your life.  I have an empty house of children, but I have 2 very healthy kiddos!

3). Each house is ruled by a different planet based on which zodiac sign occupies that house. For example:  My first house is Capricorn which is ruled by Saturn.  Therefore Saturn is the most influential planet for my first house topics.

4). The Big Three points of a personality in a chart that you will hear in pop culture are the Sun Sign, the Moon Sign, and the Ascendant.  The Sun Sign is what most people are familiar with; so when someone says, “I’m a Libra,” what they are really saying is my birthday is between September 20th and October 19th when the Sun is in Libra.  

5). Planets make aspects to each other.  This is a fancy way of talking about how the planets are seeing one another.  If two planets are in a friendly aspect, like a trine or a sextile, then they get along and the energy usually manifests easier.  However, if they are facing each other, squaring off, in each other’s blind spot, or hanging out in a house they don’t like then you are going to feel more of a struggle.

6). You aren’t going to feel everything in your Natal Chart all at once.  Different years will highlight different areas and planets.  A good astrologer will be able to time this out; birthdays are especially optimal times to have this done.

7). Most pop culture horoscopes are actually meant to be read from your Ascendant’s sign, not your Sun Sign.  This one is always a *Surprise* for most people!!! You can figure out what your Ascendant sign if you have your birth time and calculate your chart.  Be sure to double check your Mom’s memory with your birth certificate for an accurate time.

8). The horizontal line running from Asc to Dc is the horizon.  You can literally see where the sun and the moon revolved around you the moment you took your first breath! This line says a lot about you and your relationships.

9). The MC is the highest point in the chart and it can give us clues as to where your career aspirations are.

10). When the planets are moving direct, they follow counter-clock wise around the wheel, with the exception of the Sun.  Only when planets are moving retrograde will they travel clockwise.

For more information, you can look up your own birth chart on www.astro-seek.com or book a reading with me for a more personalized reading.

Monthly Moon Transits of the Horoscope

The moon is the fastest moving planet in our horoscope changing sign every 2 – 2.5 days.  It is the first thing astrologers look to when we hear people are in a funk, or are feeling on top of the world.  It can give us clues to weight loss and fitness or our self confidence. Even the phases of the moon gives us clues as to creative cycle of life and personality depending upon which phase of the moon you were born in. All in all, the moon is pretty damn important.  Even in those small windows every month as the moon changes sign, it can give us clues as to how our emotions are doing and how to keep our balance.

When the Moon is in Aries watch your own impatience.  You might crave excitement or the novel.  It’s also very easy to take things personally as those feelings will be running hot like the fire sign Aries is.  Go ahead and try that new fitness class.  The endorphins will have your mood soaring.  Even just taking a new route home from work will stimulate your brain into new ways of being present.

When the Moon is in Taurus, you will be more likely to go to your favorite restaurant and order the “usual” vs. trying the hip new spot on the corner.  It’s also a good time to relook at your goals with fresh determination and drive.  The Moon is exalted here.  Taurus is a fixed sign, meaning it doesn’t like change.  Home and family really doesn’t change either which is what the moon rules.  It is all about security and routine and looking at what is working for you.

When the Moon is in Gemini, we have empathy for those born under this natal energy as we feel more scattered than normal and we have a low attention span.  However, on the positive, we discover more things are piquing our curiosity and leading us down new paths.  Its a good time to find that one friend and process things over a cuppa tea while the hours tick by.  Pour your heart out and you’ll find that in a round about way, that original problem was solved.

When the Moon is transiting Cancer, it’s a good time to call mom, stay home for the night, make soup, and cuddle.  Cancer’s sign is represented by the crab, who keeps her guard up, but lives in the watery deep beneath that hard shell.  The emotions can often overtake us like waves overtake the shore.  Break out the tissues, my friend.  No one can keep up the hard exterior for that long.  The Moon loves being here.  She’s home.

When the Moon is in Leo, it is time to let your heart light shine.  Let your passion drive you forth with happiness and confidence.  Let your enthusiasm be contagious and encourage others to find their light too.  They are the creatives.  Go patronize the arts, the music scene, even the culinary arts.  It also rules the house of true love so connect romantically with the one who makes your heart quicken.  Leos also are the sign of that rules children, so any extra time with little people will be well invested. On the cautionary side, Leos can be pretty selfish so be aware about the Me, Myself, and I focus.

When the Moon in Virgo its a good time to be more conscious about healthy eating, getting check ups, or even getting Fido in for his yearly once over with the vet.  You might feel the need to start organizing a bit around the office.  Break out the checklists!!!  Just even putting pen to paper can calm that anxiety and make things feel more manageable.  Just be careful of offering that dreaded (but well intended) unsolicited advice to others that Virgos are so infamous for.

When the Moon is in Libra, it is time to turn up that charm.  Cater to your partner and feel the intimacy grow.  Libra is also the sign of the scales, so now it time to help negotiate a balance for all parties to understand how to get along when feelings are delicate.  Diplomacy is an art and Libras, are the Renaissance Masters.  

When the Moon is in Scorpio it is a time to dig deep.  You might feel a bit more secretive and driven to understand the “why” or the “how” of your emotions or the drive of others.  Schedule that therapy appointment or crack open the dusty journal.  Questions are good.  Solitude is good.  Trust your gut.  The Moon struggles here a bit.  Doing so much active questioning and trying to give form of watery emotions is hard work.

When the moon is in Sagittarius, it is time to take the wisdom of Scorpio, aim that bow and arrow of the archer to the target, and do some truth telling that Sag’s are so famous for.  The funny thing is, Sagittarius natives are so optimistic they will almost make you feel optimistic even when hearing the brutal truth. Instead of the smaller viewpoint of Scorpio which is mostly individual, open up your awareness to the bigger picture of Sagittarius’s world.  Go explore.  Learn a new skill.  Get curious about a new culture.  Book that trip across the world.  Enroll yourself in higher learning.  Just watch out about becoming too preachy or thinking that your truth is the only truth out there.

When the Moon in in Capricorn, you might be feeling a bit isolated and lonely.  Again, the moon is not really functioning here so those messy emotions are not getting in the way what so ever!  You also might be feeling like you are getting a ton of stuff done, or at least planning to. Caps are notorious for their long-term goals.  On the downside, you can’t figure out what in the hell your gut is telling you.  It’s like all transmission and radio signals have gone dark on that front.  Now is the time to polish up that resume and ask for a new leadership role at work or figure out if this is where you want to be in 5 years time. Work might feel like it’s taking over your life when the moon is in this sign.

When the Moon enters Aquarius it is time to change the status quo.  End habits that are holding you back from your authentic and idealized self.  Do small things first like brush your teeth with your non-dominant hand or take a different bus to work.  Give your own quirks grace because they make you an individual.  Look into joining new groups, whether its the local business bureau or sitting at a new lunch table.  Barriers will be broken down and new friendships can be made. On a warning, Aquarius is a fixed air sign. When the moon is here you can get stuck arguing for the sake of arguing or getting so invested in your point, you’ve lost sight of the true goal.

When the Moon makes its journey through Pisces it is a good time to remind yourself that change is the only constant.  Build your intuition; look for the coincidences as signs.  Tune in to what others might be feeling.  Build your emotional intelligence.  Respond as you would like to be responded to.  You will feel others open up to you on completely different wavelengths.

Moon Signs in the Birth Chart

While everyone knows their Sun sign, did you know you also had a Moon sign?  This second luminary rules those born at night. Your moon sign tells us how you like to be nurtured and loved. Understanding this can help you feel like you can conquer the world or the fastest remedy to break out of a funk.  It is how we react instinctively. Let’s dive right in, shall we?  

Moon in Aries individuals can be pretty direct, spontaneous, impatient, and reckless. They need to be assertive in order to feel secure.  However they can be over reactive.  Their competitive natures can turn combative and get in the way of finding security.   

Moon in Taurus individuals are ruled by their 5 senses.  They like to cuddle up with warm blankets, their favorite chocolates, and their favorite meal lofting from the kitchen.  These individuals are stable and loyal friends who are there with you until the very end.  But, they will also hang onto their territory as it’s being pried from them as well.  They are beyond stubborn and will argue the sky is green if that’s what they first became attached to.  

Moon in Gemini natives can see both sides of the coin.  Part of their own frustration is that they can feel everyone’s point of view and their emotions can change on a dime.  They are perceptive socially and they are expressive.  Often they can get pegged as being inconsistent, but this has more to do with their talents of being open to everyone and trying to filter things vs. a malicious intent to frustrate others with their behaviors.  They often get criticized for not keeping intimate things private, but its their way of trying to process and make sense of their world.

Moon in Cancer natals can be a bit over-sensitive and thus over-protective.  They are the original Mama Bears of the zodiac.  They almost have a second sense for what someone needs before they need it.  Nurturing is their strength.  However, they are highly in tune with other’s moods and reactions even to their own detriment.  They have all the feels.  

Moon in Leo individuals love to be the centers of everyones attention.  They are generous, warm, and respond with enthusiasm that radiates from their heart.  They rely on their ability to dramatize and create a one-person show that draws you in for everyones amusement which feeds into their happiness.  Sometimes the life of the party is so caught up, they don’t realize that others are not receiving them as well as they’d hoped.  When they don’t get their way they can get a bit dramatic and petulant.

Moon in Virgo individuals are precise.  I once read that they take worrying to an art form (I am a Moon in Virgo).  There is always a practical solution to every problem for a Moon in Virgo.  Indeed.  In a former life I was a pediatric emergency social worker.  You came in to the ER via ambulance?  No problem.  I’d find you a ride home.  You came in without medication or food?  No problem.  I could take the most terrible awful emotional situations and break them down into steps of intervention, emotional reassurance, and practical assistance.  I served others to my hearts content.  It. Was. Awesome.    But it also burned me out.  I was so efficient that I also boxed my own emotions up in the process.  It was like Mary Poppins on steroids.  That is what Moon in Virgos do:  practical solutions to problems, refines their own emotional reactions to the point it looks rehearsed, feels secure by making improvements, reinstalls order.  They love working behind the scenes making things happen magically.  Practically Perfect in every way until you end up on anti-anxiety meds to deal with all the repression….just sayin’…

Moon in Libras are infamous for what I call “the dinner conversation.”  You know the one:  It starts off with the innocuous question,  “Where do you want to eat?”  30 minutes later there are 140 options on the table and not a decision in site.  Never, ever, ask a Libra.  They will always default to whatever you want and its not because they don’t have an opinion.  They do.  But they would rather make you happy and eat icky sushi 100% of the time.  Moon in Libras value harmony above everything else.  They are the ultimate conflict avoidant personality types.  They are the sequential relationship people and only feel they are at their best in close relationships at all times.  

Moon in Scorpio key phrase is ‘the waters run deep”.  With these individuals you can see the depths of their beings in their eyes.  Everything is experience to them, especially experience where things did not work out in their favor.  To them, they wrap that up in a bow and carry it into their heart for their soul to grow from.  They survive off of deep emotional connection.  Fluffy talk about the weather will not sustain them, and those who are the privileged few in their inner circle will be let into their mystery and passion.  You will ask a question and they will deflect with a question.  Scorpios are the original masters of psychotherapy:  the diggers of the emotional depths.  They are hard to truly understand, and they like it that way.

Moon in Sagittarius brings people who like to explore and have fun doing it.  They crave independence, the higher truth, and an active search for meaning.  They feel the most comfortable when their mind is on a journey either through the pages of a book or across a new landscape on a new adventure.  They are the natural questioners of everything and often times the quest becomes more important than the question itself.  There are times when their enthusiasm follows the pied piper and they become gullible, arrogant, fanatic, or preaching.  

Moon in Capricorn struggles a bit here as the moon is in its detriment.  The moon, which represents emotion, is in the most restrictive space yet.  Can transformation happen?  Yes!  All we have to do is look to Scrooge himself and see that.  Natives with the Moon in Capricorn are incredibly hard workers and they get their emotional self-fulfillment out of what they have accomplished.  Often they are the “Negative Nelly’s” of the group, as they are always seeming to be responding less than enthusiastically (especially compared to a Leo Moon).  However, it’s more of a realistic flair than negative flair, in their book.  They want to feel secure and not let down or disappointed.  Being realistic from the get go helps them manage their expectations and their emotions better.  They feel comfortable in the role of being in charge.  But as they say, it can be lonely at the top.  

The Moon in Aquarius person is one who hasn’t met a friend he hasn’t liked.  Everyone is a potential friend or social connection in their book.  They need to connect socially and share their ideas in order to feel like themselves.  Imagine a college professor without a classroom to lecture to.  That would be an Aquarius’s idea of hell.  Where would they have the space to challenge ideas, feed off of each other, make connections, come up with other new schemas?  They will play devils advocate, not because they agree, but because no one else will and because it’s interesting and fun.  They like to know the limits just so they can peer beyond them.  They may not realize they are driving other people absolutely crazy by doing it.  Most ideas were not born in isolation as Aquarius would attest.  They like their freedom and their independence and the recognition that what they contribute is worthy and meaningful.  Anyone who wants to be part of an Aquarius’s inner circle or love interest must start with the friendship realm first and foremost.  Only by not needing an Aquarius, will you actually attract one.  

Moon in Pisces individuals are compassionate and sensitive.  They are often unfocused as they are daydreaming and highly imaginative.  They also live for peace and a sense of group wholeness in order for them to feel secure in their place.  While it seems they are unaffected by emotions, the opposite is true.  They in fact are very sensitive to the emotional tide, but let it flow in and out of them trusting everything changes.